EPIC ILLUSTRATED #18

“Dog in the Donor Bank”

Writer & Artist: Mike Saenz

A man enlists in the astronaut corps to escape a breakup with his girlfriend. He develops hallucinations of a dog and kills it. Then finds out under the hallucination he killed his captain.

“Business Hours: Monday through Friday, 9 to 5”

Writer: Chris Chairmont

Artist: John Bolton

A woman gets bugged at home by monsters who don’t get that she doesn’t work outside of business hours.

“The Last of the Dragons: The Arrival”

Writers: Carl Potts and Dennis O’Neal

Artists: Carl Potts and Terry Austin

The monks make it to America and kill the sailors. The samurai decides to desert them and get revenge for their deceptions. The ninja half breed also makes it to America.

“Bookview”

by Jo Duffy

A review of The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley. A Camelot story told from the women’s perspective. She liked it.

“Mediaview”

by Dennis O’Neal

An article on why he liked the movie Videodrome while everyone else he knows hates it.

“Obsession”

Writer & Artist: Peter Kuper

A taxi driver in New York is obsessed with nuclear war. He meets a woman with similar obsession.

“Generation Zero: The Connection”

Writers: Pepe Moreno and Archie Goodwin

Artist: Pepe Moreno

The explorer ship finds another colony named Seahaven. They capped an active volcano for energy. They cure Juan Falcon and decide to join with Northold in rebuilding the world. Juan also falls in love with the assistant administrator.

“Garbage Skow”

Writer & Artist: Bob Aull

In the future two guys now dump the Earth’s garbage in orbit. The garbage is a massive planet with a small lifeless Earth around it.

“Syd Mead Interview”

Interview by Rick Bryant

An interview with conceptual artist who did Blade Runner.

“The Art of Go Nagai”

by Jo Duffy

An article on the artwork of a famous Manga artist.

“Oni”

Writer & Artist: Go Nagai

The origins of the demon Oni are a peasant who was transformed after losing his family to an evil warlord.

“Gameview”

by Steven Grant

An article on new computer gaming company called EPYX.

“In Search of Einstein’s Brain”

Writer & Artist: Rick Geary

A man searches for what happened to Einstein’s brain and find it powers the city of Wichita.

“Tail Gunner”

Writer: Jo Duffy

Artist: Kent Williams

A man hires a mercenary to lead him to his skeleton so his spirit can find peace.

Well, another issue that had good and bad. The good are the continuing stories of the Last Dragon and Generation Zero. Some of the standalone stories were good and some were not. The interview as always was boring.

CONAN THE BARBARIAN #264

“White Apes & Ebon Thrones Part 1”

Writer: Roy Thomas adapted from story “The Thief of Forthe” by Clifford Ball.

Artist: John Watkiss

Conan has made it to the Brythunian city-state of Kelbaza. While in the local tavern he runs into a former companion named Isparana. Isparana has run afoul of some local thugs and the two are forced to flee the tavern. Isparana suggests they rob the local wizard’s black tower. They climb into it and are captured by white apes. The wizard Karlk wants Conan to assassinate the local king and take his necklace. Karlk hopes to gain the Ebon throne with the necklace. Isparana will be held hostage until the deed is done.

This story that was adapted was done for Weird Tales shortly after Howard’s death. The magazine wanted to have a writer replace Howard’s sword and sorcery, so they commissioned this. Thomas also added Isparana who was a character from Andrew Offutt’s stories. I think adding her to the series was a great idea. I loved the character, and she would make a good companion for Conan. Also, the story itself fits in to Conan’s world and so far, is quite interesting. We also get a new artist and to be honest I am not impressed. His style is a little too weird for me. That is really the only complaint for this issue.

LORD OF THE JUNGLE #4

“Untitled”

Writer: Dan Jurgens

Artist: Benito Gallego

Tarzan has stolen some gems from the museum. He gets surrounded by the police while escaping. We then go back decades when Tarzan was being blackmailed by Shaw. Tarzan refuses to get the gems until he takes Bouanga hostage and threatens to kill him. Tarzan goes in search of the Valley of the Mists. He gets Kerchak to lead him there. Once there he sneaks into the pyramid in the center of the village and prys off the gems on the throne. He is then confronted by warriors of the village. Back in the 1950’s Tarzan defeats the police with the help of Bouanga.

This issue did a good job of telling us why Tarzan is stealing the gems. The story in the 1950’s wraps around nicely with the one from the past. Tarzan has to right a wrong done to save his friend. An interesting if somewhat different Tarzan, that was established by Burroughs.

GROO IN THE WILD #2

“In the Wild Part 2”

Writers: Sergio Aragones and Mark Evanier

Artist: Sergio Aragones

Groo and Rufferto are eating all the chickens in a village. The army of King Putrio has arrived and finds out they are facing Groo. Groo naturally loves a fray and drives the army away. They then head down the road to the next village. This village had Ortix a delicious antelope type creature. Only they were made extinct to make ivory carvings. This pisses off Groo who wrecks all the ivory shops.

King Putrio sends his army again to face Groo but tells them they are facing pirates. Groo comes on the construction of New Town which is a housing project. This project has destroyed fertile woods and Rufferto is the one who starts the attack. Groo joins in and the construction is destroyed. This was also a project of King Putrio and he drafts everyone to fight Groo. Groo also gets drafted, and the army joins up with the original army. Only Groo is revealed, and everyone panics. The Rufferto strip on back has Rufferto steal a chicken and fight off a woman with a frying pan and two dogs. Rufferto decides to give the chicken to a starving family.

This was another fun issue with Groo going around and destroying stuff like he always does. King Putrio’s greed is destroying the wildlife in his kingdom and Groo is actually doing something positive.

THE FIST OF GOD #3

“Chapter 3: The Seat of Power”

Writer: R.A. Jones

Artist: Bruce Burcham

Mick Taggart finds out his brother’s wife is Jehan. The brother tells the story of their life and why they have different names. Taggart then finds out that his brother has the Peacock Throne and is giving it to the Shah that the British support for the leader of Persia. His brother goes out to meet the troops coming to pick it up. This leaves him alone with Jehan and he tells her that he loves her. Just then Kurdish bandits attack and take the throne and Jehan with Taggart left for dead. He goes after the Kurds and comes on a palace. Inside is Soltan with Jehan captive. He has a plan to resurrect the last Kurdish emperor of Persia, Karim Khan.

Another fun installment of this story. We find out about his brother and how they were separated. Why Jehan was kidnapped. Soltan wanted to trade her for the Peacock Throne. Taggart loves Jehan and tracks her to a fortress where Soltan wants to resurrect the old emperor. A fun story told in the old pulp style.

EPIC ILLUSTRATED #17

“Generation Zero: The Chess Game & The Phantom City”

Writers: Pepe Moreno and Archie Goodwin

Artist: Pepe Moreno

It is after a nuclear war and a survivalist base in Iceland called Northhold has survived. They send out an expedition in an advanced craft to explore. Juan Falcon and two other misfits are chosen. Their first stop is New York. They get attacked by the mutants who are under the control of The Priest. He uses the communications network to get them against anyone not mutated. Juan is contaminated and with these two friends track down the HQ of the Priest. They find out it is a robot and destroy the computer.

“Mime”

Writer & Artist: Will Brown

In an authoritative future a mime defaces the government posters. The police kill him, but the mime’s blood creates more mimes.

“Bookview”

By Jo Duffy

A review of Arthur Clarke’s 2010: Second Odyssey. She loved it.

“Abraxas and the Earthman: Man and Whale”

Writer & Artist: Rick Veitch

Rottwag uses a powerful laser gun to hunt down Abraxas. Isaac has merged his soul with Abraxas. The other souls that died also merge with the whales. They defeat Abraxas and the whalers.

“Mediaview”

By Dennis O’Neil

Review of the movies: E.T., Blade Runner, The Road Warrior and Poltergeist.

“Weird Adventures on Other Worlds”

By Ron Goulart

An article on Planet Comics a comic company from the 1940’s that published sci-fi with handsome heroes and scantily clad women.

“The Last of the Dragons: The Departure.”

Writers: Carl Potts and Dennis O’Neil

Artists: Carl Potts and Terry Austin

The dragons are being transported to America. Ninjas are hired to stop them, and the old samurai is hired to defeat the ninjas which is what he does.

“The Wanderer”

Writers: Michael Kaluta and Archie Goodwin

Artist: Michael Kaluta

A wizard has to fight evil demons.

“Game view”

by Steven Grant

A review of the boardgame for Judge Dredd. Also, a bit on the collapse of the video game market.

“Star Slammers Preview”

By Walter Simonson

A preview of an upcoming graphic novel.

“Godfather Death”

Writer & Artist: Scott Hampton adapted from Grimm’s fairy tales.

A man has too many children and looks for a godfather. He rejects God for Death. The baby grows into a doctor and is given medicine to cure anyone. As long has he doesn’t use it on patients that Death claims. The doctor disobeys and saves a king and princess. He is killed by Death.

First, I loved the new series Generation Zero. It is the best series this comic has ever printed. Abraxas came to a weird if satisfying conclusion. The Last Dragon is going strong. I loved the Godfather Death story. Otherwise, the other stories were mediocre to downright bad.

STARRING SONYA DEVEREAUX #1 RENEGADE ROAD RIDERS 3

“Renegade Road Riders 3”

Writers: Brendon & Brian Fraim with Todd Livingston & Nick Capetanakis

Artists: Brendon & Brian Fraim

Sonya Devereaux gets booked at the Catastrophe Con to premier her new movie. It is a post-apocalyptic one where the world is a big desert after a nuclear war and water is scarce. An old man comes from the desert and says he found water. He has bottles of it and wants to share but the mob beats him to death for the water. A road sister named Zephyrine the Red gets one of the bottles and takes it to her other two sisters Chevlee and Andromeda Zoom who is Sonya. They find out that the markings on the bottle lead to Bird Rock Canyon.

Of course, there are other gangs who have bottles and figured out the same place including the fearsome mutant gang the U-236. Andromeda and her sisters have to fight the various gangs off and have some lesbian sex. They find the secret entrance to the lake. They defeat the U-236 gang and have a skinny dip in the lake.

This issue they decided to parody my favorite genre, The post-apocalypse road warrior movie. The writers clearly are fans as this and heavily influenced by the great Cirio H. Santiago the Philippine director that churned out so many of these movies in the eighties and nineties. It has all the kooky gangs with their road rider type vehicles. One is a geeky who is pissed off Sonya won’t date him. Another is ones that worship fire and of course the mutants of the U-236. There is even a scene where Andromeda tells of the apocalypse through a Genesis song. Plus, it is full of action and gratuitous lesbianism. This has the be the best of Sonya’s movies.

PREZ #4

“Vampire in the White House”

Writer: Joe Simon

Artist: Jerry Grandenetti

Prez is dedicating a new canal in the country of Moravia. It promises to grow their economy and they can pay back the billion given to them. Later a bat winged helicopter arrives with a wolfman. The wolfman is the ambassador of Transylvania. The canal has drained the lakes and rivers of their country, and they demand it be destroyed. Prez refuses and war is declared.

The wolfman left his coffin shaped briefcase which has a vampire without legs on a wheeled board. He tries to turn Prez into a vampire but is driven off. The Moravians then come and tell that the Transylvanians have a plan. They have loaded their one plane with bats to drop on Washington. The bats have rabies. Prez wants to wipe out Transylvania, but Congress doesn’t believe the threat is real. Fortunately, Eagle Free gets his birds to do a Kamikaze run on the plane and drop it into the ocean. They then debate if they have to give Transylvania billions to rebuild as all countries defeated by the US gets.

So ends the final issue of this bizarre series. It has to be the weirdest comic series I ever read. Apparently, it was just too far out and groove for the young people of the time. I can see why it didn’t make it as a successful series. Still, it is interesting from a historical perspective. I can’t say I was bored reading it. An 18-year-old in a turtleneck sweater as President. He flies around in Air Force One which he named The Freebee. His Native American friend who lives in a teepee by the Potomac and talks to animals is the head of the FBI. He also never bothers to wear a shirt. This was just too nuts, but I couldn’t make this up if I tried. An interesting read for my Christmas vacation.

CONAN THE BARBARIAN #263

“The Voice of Moloq”

Writer: Roy Thomas adapted from story “The Voice of El-Lil” by Robert E. Howard

Artists: Mike Docerty and Ricardo Villagran

Conan and Hobb are ambushed by man-beasts in the Border Kingdom. These beasts are servants of a race that lives in a valley. There is a lake with an island that has a giant horned skull. The two are to be sacrificed to Moloq. There is a gong in the mouth of the skull and Conan is tied to the gong. The gongs sound threatens to kill Conan. Fortunately, he breaks free and starts a revolt among the not men. They overthrow the inhabitants of the valley and Hobb stays with a dancing girl to rule them.

This was the 60th anniversary of Conan. Roy gives us another non-REH story adapted to Conan. This one was originally dealing with a lost Sumerian civilization in contemporary times. I love how Roy always turns to Howard for stories. This was a very enjoyable one. We see the last of Hobb and he made a good companion for Conan. I think it was time for him to leave though. Conan needed to be solo for new adventures.

PREZ #3

“Invasion of America”

Writer: Joe Simon

Artist: Jerry Grandenetti

A group dressed like Revolutionary War soldiers led by George Washington comes up to the White House and fires a cannon shell into the Oval Office. Inside the shell is a dwarf with a message. Prez is supporting an amendment to ban private gun ownership. He finds out the dwarf is part of a group called the Minutemen. Lead by Gregor Washington the great-great grandnephew of George Washington. Eagle Free has his agents infiltrate the organization.

The organization has a money problem. They try to print counterfeit 10-dollar bills, but they are of poor quality. They get a traitor in the treasury department to print out one-dollar bills. Now freshly paid and armed they march on Washington. Prez decides that to avoid bloodshed he will challenge Gregory to a fight with the winner taking all. Gregory has his karate expert dress up as him and take the challenge. Prez beats him and Gregory decides to attack. Only the FBI agent infiltrated manages to capture Gregory and save the day. Later Prez addresses Congress and announces he has learned a lesson. That force can’t be met with cool phrases, love or flowers. The young think he is a traitor and warmonger while the old members applaud his realization.

Well, this was one wild issue. A real left-wing rant on gun control and anyone who opposes the government. Gregory is a nut who wears wooden dentures because Washington did. His army is armed with muskets and goes to fight men with tanks, submachineguns and jet aircraft. Obviously not a good idea. Oh, and the $1 bill now has Prez’s image on it. Prez also realizes that hippy love doesn’t work against aggression. Who would have figured. The series definitely went around the bend this issue.